How can you determine whether your need to be in control is helping you move forward or hindering you in some way? As a former dominatrix, I know all about being in control! When I was in the “space of the dungeon” with my clients, being in control was necessary. My clients not only expected me to be in control, but it was also required of me for their own safety. (I needed to navigate where things went and how things turned out.) But in day to day business, being in control or being a “control freak” is not always going to be in your best interest and can sometimes be a detriment.

I know this because I have seen it in myself and I have seen it in my clients. I predominantly work with two types of clients.

Personality Type One:

When it comes to working, they are super driven, motivated, and successful (the D Personality in the Disc Profile.) However, in other aspects of their life their life is a cluster.

Being a Control Freak can mean a sink full of messy dishes. Is your need to be in control helping or hindering?

With this type of client, we look at where they are being a control freak, where they need to let go, and we clear that out so they can have a well-rounded life that runs smoothly.

Personality Type Two:

This type is super smart, talented, and also fairly driven. However, there are often things that get in their way and/or pop up which enable them to resist the necessary actions required to move forward and level-up their career or company. As a result, they end up hiring all the wrong gurus and “experts” in their line of business in efforts to move forward while ignoring their intuition.

Crowd of business people with a woman in the lead - is your need to be in control helping or hindering?

Though the type two client is a control freak in a very different way, in order to move forward they must also clear out their shit to look at their business with a clear perspective.

Clear your Crap

Regardless of which personality type you are, clearing out your crap, and changing the inner landscape will allow you to be more successful, in the ways that you want to and doing it with more ease!

Guess what? This leads to making more money. Though more money is not the be-all and end-all, it does tend to be a motivator for people to actually take the necessary actions needed to get to the next level.

How does this happen? Changing your inner landscape requires you to change the whole control freak dynamic in a way that helps you move forward rather than hindering your progress.

Asset or Detriment?

So, back to the original question: How do you know whether your need to be in control is an asset or a detriment?

Ask yourself this: Is your business running super smoothly with all systems go, everybody on track, and without problems? Then, you’re probably not a control freak.

However, if your business is not running smoothly, everyone is scattered, and there are countless problems — you need to lean in and ask, “Am I being over-controlling?” IS your need to be in control helping you move forward or hindering you?

( *Note: you might not always be a control freak, but when glitches start to pop up, it is time to “Lean In”.)

Woman jumping in joy at letting go of her need to be in control

Eat that Cake!

Whether you are being over-controlling from the perspective of trying not to lose or are you controlling from the perspective you need to be large and in charge, changing your inner landscape will help you let go! This will allow you more opportunities to come in and show up in a way that moves your business and/or career forward without being “bitchy,” “bossy,” or “pushy”. (You know…all of the character traits that most people do not appreciate!).

So, I invite you to clear your crap so that you can stop being a super control freak! Though I focus a lot on business, letting go of my need to control actually enables me to enjoy the success I’ve been looking for in all areas of my life. You can have this kind of success too in your — relationships, business, finances, health and your social life. Ultimately, you can have your cake and eat it too!

If you need help, head over to to schedule your free consultation. (I think the consultation is free…!?!)