There is something so Canadian about saying “sorry” that you may not even notice how it is eroding your self esteem and your ability to go for what you want.
It might seem extreme, but look at it.
How many times do you say sorry without even thinking about it? Bumping into someone at the grocery store, someone asks to get by you, you feel you are taking too long to get your change out of your pocket, you want to get past someone blocking the aisle…and that is just at the grocery store.
If you are saying “sorry” 20-30 times a day and it is not for anything you actually did wrong, you are programming yourself little by little to see yourself as less than or needing to apologize for even existing.
Give up that engrained habit to apologize at every turn and watch how your life begins to change.
We often run around looking for the big things that we need to change to put us into action or shift out from feeling less than or even victimized by others, when it is more often the small repeated actions that become well worn grooves in our operating system that are really to blame.
I can hear the resistance “I don’t want to become a heartless bitch.” Well darling, there is a huge cavern about the size of the Grand Canyon to cross to go from being an apologetic weakling to being a heartless bitch so I would hope that you will stop when you find your happy medium.
You will not transform in one hour or even overnight so have no fear you are not going to wake up as a cold and insensitive creature tomorrow.
The reality is that you will dance with this and find that space where you own your power without needing to put anyone else down and with no need to apologize for what you do, how you do it or what you wore along the way.
If you give up apologizing then there is a really good chance that others will stop looking for a reason to judge you; since you will stop giving them reasons to judge you.
If they don’t give up those judgements….well then you can dig into the tools to become okay with that or maybe stop hanging around them.
Here is your mission ….should you choose to accept it…..
Notice how many times the “sorry” slips past your lips. And notice how many times you say it when it is not your fault.
You are not allowed to say “sorry” (well maybe if you run someone over), bite your tongue if you have to but get out of the habit and don’t allow yourself to say it.
It will be uncomfortable, I can promise you that and after about 3-4 weeks you will get to notice how much easier it is to ask for what you want and not justify or explain yourself.
If you know you are here to change the planet and would love a deep level of support to keep you on track and out of the pitfalls that can happen to us all, then reach out to have a conversation with me about how that might look. Tell me where you are at here and then we can see if we are a fit.