Welcome to the inner dominatrix classroom! Today’s lesson is all about badass marketing. There are three components to getting badass marketing in place and all of these need to be rocking to get your marketing message out there and connect with your clients.
1. Authenticity
Of course, coming from the world of the dominatrix, authenticity is the first component of badass marketing! You have to be true to who you are because we, as a society, are more aware than ever before and we are no longer as easily misled! Therefore that the typical go-to copy that used to convert leads into sales no longer works. Why? because it is not fully aligned with who you are and that creates a disconnect in your marketing.
2. Brand
Whether you have a personal brand (where you are the brand) or a company brand, you have to know the who, the voice, the colors, and what the brand stands for. But for this to truly work, you must be connected to your authenticity.
3. Message
You need to be authentic about your messaging and it needs to connect with your brand.
When all of these pieces come together your marketing is effective. But, authenticity is the most important, particularly if you are a solopreneur (or the brand is you). Why? Because you are showing up as the face of the brand and YOU are the one in front of the camera, writing blogs, posting on social media, speaking at events, etc. Therefore, there are multiple opportunities for people to notice a disconnect.
What gets in the way of our authenticity, branding, and messaging?
1. Unwilling to own who you are as an expert
To be showing up authentically, you need to own who you are as an expert! That’s a big landmine because if you’re going to stand in and be an expert then all those pieces about, “I’m an imposter. What do I know? Who am I?” come to the surface and cause a little bit of disconnect that comes through energetically.
2. Unwilling to be Judged
Here’s the funny thing, as we get clear on and firmly stand in our message, we start getting judged. We start getting haters. So we need to be willing to be judged.
Now, willing to be judged is not the same as, “I’m okay! You can go ahead and judge me!” That is not willing to be judged, that is willing to put up a wall and call everybody an asshole because they are judging you. The inner dominatrix version of willing to be judged is, “Okay, you are judging me but no problem. I’m going to take that energy and I’m going to use it as fuel to run my business. Thank you very much. Bye. Bye!” Do you see the difference?
When you are willing to receive a judgment in the same way as a compliment from a friend and welcome that in, it is really easy to show up authentically. Why? Because you are not worried about what people are saying or how they are criticizing you.
3. Unwilling to Lose
Willing to lose does not mean that you set out trying to destroy your business! Instead, it is about detachment from the outcome and letting go of the expectations. Again, this is an area that’s filled with landmines because we have attachments to ideas such as, “I need to be making this amount of money and have this kind of status.”
When it comes to marketing, these three pieces of resistance are the most common roadblocks that my clients trip on. However, when we start changing these pieces, then I see my clients rock their marketing!
How do we change these pieces?
The typical go-to fix is, “reframe it!” Now, for about 15% of people, a simple reframe is enough to get them up and going. Now for the rest of us (including myself), a reframe will give a bit of a temporary lift, but we still need to do deeper work.
Unfortunately, at an early age, when we experience judgment or criticism, our subconscious mind makes us think that we are unsafe, unworthy, and/or not valuable. Therefore, when we grow up, go out in the world, and get judged or criticized, we truly believe that we are unworthy, unsafe, and not valuable. Deeper work will move these beliefs out and disconnect the memories from the emotion. As a result, when we receive criticism, then it’s just criticism.
To do the clearing, follow the steps below. Just note this is the highlighted version.
Steps to Clear the Pieces
This is a two-statement process. Say out loud, “I’m okay to XYZ,” and “I am okay to not XYZ.”. (This is not affirmation work!) Here is an example where we use the word “judged” in place of “XYZ”:
- Say the statement “I’m okay to be judged.”
- Take a deep breath, and with an intention on the exhale move out and disconnect the energetic charge (because energy follows intention.)
- Repeat the process (say the statement, breath, clear the energetic charge) until when you say the statement, it feels neutral. (Neutral will feel the same as when you say, “The sky is blue.”)
Then do the opposite:
- Say the statement, “I’m okay to NOT be judged.”
- Then take a deep breath, and with the intention on the exhale to move out and disconnect the energetic charge.
- Repeat the process until when you say the statement, it feels neutral.
When we clear both sides of it, we are left with this space in the middle of pure choice. Choice gives us options and is freeing, and that is the point of this work! Here is a guide to perform self-clearing.
As for the Subconscious Mind
Now here’s the thing, your subconscious mind, (which is in charge of all of these programs that we’re clearing out) is like that iceberg. A lot is going on underneath that you do not see. So when doing the DIY clearing, the deeper programs are sometimes hidden deep within our subconscious mind. Now, this does not mean that the DIY is not effective! Just know that you might need to get an outside perspective to go deeper.
The Beauty of an outside perspective.
Now, the subconscious mind is designed to keep you safe. So when you are judged or criticized as a kid, you setup conditioned responses. Here is an example, “When somebody criticizes me, then it leads to XYZ (something negative). So I’m going to try to avoid being criticized!” Once your subconscious mind figures out a way that keeps you safe, it’s going to keep it locked in come hell or high water AND hide the underlying reasons from you. Thus, it can be hard to see what even needs to be cleared out!
So, we need to get the subconscious mind willing to let go of these programs. To do so, we have to convince your subconscious mind that it is and/or you are safe. By going deeper with somebody else, your subconscious mind will think that it is energetically getting its hand held, and therefore feels safe.
So, that is how you do it! Start with the DIY and if you need a deeper explanation, email me at dana@danapharant.com with the subject line, “Badass Marketing,” and we will hook you up with a strategy for actually clearing your pieces. If you know that you have bigger pieces that need to be moved out, then reach out to me at bookdana.im to set up a free consultation. Be sure to stay in touch and let me know how this works for you and I hope you get your badass marketing rocking!
